Tattoo You - Blog Day Afternoon Posted by Jeff (Wednesday June 21 2006 @ 09:20PM EDT)

You know what I hate? I hate tramp stamps, aka, ass antlers. One sure-fire way to deduct babe points is to slap a big ol' tattoo right over your ass. It adds nothing to your appearance but it surely takes away. If you're a big, fat, disgusting cow, then by all means tattoo the hell out of yourself. Skin etchings may divert attention from all that ugliness. "Really, she was ugly? Heh, the only thing I noticed was that big-ass nasty tattoo..." According to Monz, a tattoo on a nice behind is like a mustache on the Mona Lisa. He's right. All you've done is fsck it up. I'm not against all tattoos. The kind of guy who tattoos his face is the kind of guy who should tattoo his face. Dishes aren't going to clean themselves and nothing says dishwasher like a guy with a tattoo on his face. If five guys apply for that job, I'm hiring the one with a tattoo on his face. What's he gonna do, leave my restaurant for the investment brokerage firm down the street? Fsck no. The only competition for his productive time is the prison laundry. Tattoo-faced guys probably have tattoo-faced kids. Dishes aren't gonna clean themselves sixteen years from now. If I hire tattoo man, then I'm set for several generations. What about ear spacers? They are perfect mechanism to redistribute wealth from the bottom back to the top. Thanks to the wonders of ear spacers, working class kids can help repay a young doctor's student loans. Slap those fsckers in your ears and you've got surgery in your future, Dumbo. For thousands of dollars, a plastic surgeon will close a hole you didn't need in the first place. If you stick spacers in your ears, then you've committed yourself to the rewarding field of manual labor. "Here's your nametag and your broom." With the exception of President Bush, everybody is accountable to somebody else. The guy in charge of Tattoo Face and Big Lobes has a boss who never wants to see those bozos standing around. Between projects they get pretend projects whose only objective is to make sure they don't stand around. "Move that lumber pile ten feet to the right." Why are you moving the lumber pile ten feet to the right? Because you tattooed your face and expanded your lobes, dumbass.

< Correction | Libertarian Makes BIG Mistake >

By MattC (Thursday June 22 2006 @ 10:58AM EDT)

The stamp can be forgiven if the body is hot enough, like on Anna Kournikova. Don't worry Anna, I won't judge you for it.

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By Jeff (Friday June 23 2006 @ 08:19AM EDT)

Many of you are ignoring BDA News. Do so at you're own detriment. Monz posted a link to the Best. News story. Ever. It's kind of Jerry Springer meets the local affliate.

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By Bill (Friday June 23 2006 @ 09:55AM EDT)

Peace Takes Courage

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By KISS MY ASS (Thursday December 14 2006 @ 03:55PM EST)

UR A FUCKING BITCH

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By Emma (Sunday December 17 2006 @ 11:40AM EST)

You do realize that the holes close up if you take the spacers out, don't you?

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By Jemima (Tuesday December 19 2006 @ 11:49PM EST)

ROFL Ass hole

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By isaac (Saturday January 06 2007 @ 10:21PM EST)

spacers dont close up if u go past 10mm.. i have a 10mm in and goin to 12mm soon.. and im getitng my right ear done

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By Tori (Monday January 08 2007 @ 10:25PM EST)

Yea streched lobes will close up on their own. Believe you me, I've had to redo my plenty of times.

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By pziddle (Monday February 19 2007 @ 08:23PM EST)

Why Are you on this site anyway coen hole?!

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By what the hell (Sunday March 11 2007 @ 12:02PM EDT)

your a bitch and need to get a life and stop bitchen about what other people do

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By Mark (Monday April 02 2007 @ 11:52AM EDT)

So basically, you're going to worry yourself with what everyone else is doing while neglecting your own life? Sounds great where do I sign up? It's personality, something I'm guessing you either had stripped from you as a young child by your drunken raged father, or by the bully down the street from the school yard. Pull your head out of your ass, this world would be a lot better off if people like you would stop worrying about whatever the fuck it is I'm doing, and worry about yourself.

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By joe (Thursday July 05 2007 @ 03:29PM EDT)

So true! Lobe spacers, tattoos on the face....hey at least nobody has to hand them a 'stupid' sign...they made their own! LOL!

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