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We The People - American Empire
Posted by Jeff (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 07:00PM EST)
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The American people have spoken. We approved torture in Abu Grahib, Guantanamo Bay and Baghram. Don't be in the wrong place at the wrong time because we've agreed to suspend due process of law whenever we are frightened. As a rule, we condoned pre-emptive war. The United States is a nation of nation-builders now. Pax Americana. We rule by military decree, not by consensus. One-hundred thousand dead is a small price to
pay for the incarceration of a single man.
As far as we're concerned, the deficit isn't deep enough. What does it matter? Earthly debts are meaningless after the Rapture. We consider environmental conservation nonsensical. If the Lord is going to destroy the world, then why should we preserve it? We are a faith-based nation. We will not allow data to blur our vision. Facts that do not support our preconceived notions will be discarded. We support programs that redistribute public money to Christian organizations. For need of assistance, ye shall recieve the Word. To combat Islamic fundamentalism we must rely on a literal interpretation and devotion to Scripture.
We anticipate and approve justices whose Constitutional interpretations will make it possible to incarcerate women for family-planning decisions. If a woman gets pregnant now, then so must she have a family now. If she's not ready for children, then she should blow him. Speaking of fellatio, we approved social contracts in which only one partner may perform that act. For the sin of h0m0s3xuality, we permit the government to take property upon the death of one of two gay partners. We refuse an ailing gay person the right to choose visitors during hospitalization. Since h0m0sexuality is a lifestyle choice, we don't want to do anything to encourage that sort of behavior.
The world may not like our decisions, but it doesn't have our firepower. All U.S. foreign policy decisions will be made in Washington except for those made in Jerusalem. We will invade those countries we choose to invade. The proceeds are reserved for Halliburton. Nations that fail to help finance our excursions will be deemed enemies of Freedom. They will feel our wrath. Just consider what happened to France: We renamed their fries.
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An aside to the reality-based community: These guys are far too full of hubris to not self-destruct. Nixon, Reagan, and Clinton paled in arrogance compared with this crew. The scandal that either topples or renders impotent the Bush administration is probably already in the works. Enjoy the ride.
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By Jeff (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 07:37PM EST)
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I told you. When the Rapture comes, all debts are forgiven!
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By Jeff (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 07:37PM EST)
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There comes a time in every Northern boy's life when he sees himself in Gettysburg on field at Cemetary Ridge. He gazes through time where General Pickett's soldiers affix bayonetts. And he thinks to himself, "If only these Southern fscks had won the Civil War."
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By Mattc (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 01:54PM EST)
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Indeed. The North's victory during the civil war was a victory for mercantilism over freedom, legitimized a rigged election, allowed a commander in chief to justify disregarding the Constitution at every turn, and finished the Revolutionary War finally, when Hamitonian strong central government triumphed over Jeffersonian freedom and democracy. Bush is the heir to Lincoln in both party name and ideology.
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By Jeff (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 08:58PM EST)
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From Eric Alterman:
The problem is just this: Slightly more than half of the citizens of this country simply do not care about what those of us in the “reality-based community” say or believe about anything.
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By Jeff (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 09:18PM EST)
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Here's a new map that's being emailed around on the Internets:
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By Jeff (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 05:29PM EST)
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The Federal government redistributes public money from the Northeast, the Rust Belt and the Pacific Coast to the South and Southwest. In other words, money flows from the Blue States to the red ones. When George W. Bush's huge bills come due, guess who's picking up the tab? The serfdom you fear is caused by reckless deficit spending. Of course if you're waiting for the Rapture, none of this really matters.
source: Public Policy Institute
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By Ms Q (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 02:49PM EST)
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Brrrrr...............it's chilly in this Blog.
At least Giant has tried to lighten the mood however, I think the Geo jokes should stay on the shelf with the rocks. Does ANYONE out there have work to do?
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By julie (Wednesday November 03 2004 @ 11:35PM EST)
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Does anyone know the immigration laws/requirements of Canada?
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By Jeff (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 07:29AM EST)
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Anybody who's been across the Canadian border knows this isn't true. While they search the underside of your car and grill you with questions on the American side, the Canadians are like, "Come on, come on. Hurry up!" It must be the easiest international border crossing in the world...
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By Miss Ginger (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 07:52AM EST)
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Especially if you come through Quebec.
Oh, and Will, I'm sure if Kerry had have won, you'd have been a gracious loser.
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By doctordoug (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 10:57AM EST)
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Just don't mention working,... They hate it when you come to work.
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By Funkman (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 08:09AM EST)
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The gist of the article was getting there is easy - staying is a little harder.
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By Mattc (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 01:58PM EST)
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However Canada uses a points system to score applicants and US citizens will score higher in the compatability area, so while they don't get to jump ahead in line, US immigrants will be more likely to be granted stay when they are processed.
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By Mattc (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 01:59PM EST)
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Well look at the bright side, Bush only gets four more years and things are going to get a *lot* worse before they get better. President Cheney? I don't think so.
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By Jeff (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 03:52PM EST)
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This is the bright side? Ugh...
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By GeoGiant (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 07:33AM EST)
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So, I am the last person in the break room today. I spot an open box of donuts on the table, which is not uncommon at my workplace. Apparently there are numerous office rituals that require round blobs of dough to be dipped into lard, fried, and covered in some sugary substance and then presented to the masses to enjoy. Anyway, I fill my coffee cup and make an about face when I notice that one HALF of a donut is left in the box. ONE HALF OF A DONUT. What the hell! Eat the whole donut or walk away.
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By Miss Ginger (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 07:54AM EST)
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You have to wonder if they ate half of it, then put it back with their gooey lip funk all over it, or if they broke it in half first, then put it back in the box with their evil finger funk all over it.
Mmmmmmmmmm, carbs.
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By GeoGiant (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 08:15AM EST)
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The donut was cut in half but I am sure that someone had their bacon-grease covered fingers all over that half when they cut it!
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By GeoGiant (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 10:47AM EST)
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To lighten the mood I will share some hysterical little ditties that knocked them dead at the PCPG seminar last year:
Geological sexual harassment = Grabben a dike by the cleavage!
I'm a geologist and I'm hung like a horst!
Geologist drill at home and at work - yeah baby!
Geologists probe crevasses - you know it!
Geologists know their plagioclase feldspar - damn skippy!
Believe it or not�..Geologists have their faults.
It always seems like, "The more you try to be gneiss, the more you get taken for granite"
Remember�. Schist happens.
Is that a belemnite in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?
And lastly, may the quartz be with you!
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By Miss Ginger (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 11:04AM EST)
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Freaking hilarious!
"Believe it or not…..Geologists have their faults" <-- My personal fave.
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By GeoGiant (Thursday November 04 2004 @ 11:08AM EST)
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You breccia! My sediments exactly!
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Enlighten me, Marge
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The most formidable weapon against errors of any kind is reason.
-- Thomas Paine
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We Did Our Job!
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